I once dated a guy who said my motto should be: some is good, more is better, and too much is just enough. He was referring to my cooking. I always prepared enough for a crowd even when I was cooking for just the two of us. He was a minimalist (didn’t have a word for it back then) so you can imagine how abundant my dinner table looked to a guy who was happy to eat bread and cheese for dinner.
Recently I’ve been thinking a lot about abundance and also, about the repetition in my life. I rarely do things once. I often do them twice. Like sometimes I’ll watch a movie and want to watch it again the very same weekend because I know I’ll see it through a completely different lens and I want a more intense encounter with the film. I want to say, “Ahhhhhhhhhh, so clever. I missed that the first time ’round.” My husband absolutely refuses to watch a film twice in the same weekend but I noticed recently while I was traveling that he rented Begin Again for the third time. There’s something about that movie that he just loves. I love it, too. I want to tell him that I will gladly watch it again.
And again.
And again.
And books. I like to read them twice, too. Unless they are in the suspense genre, like The Goldfinch for example. I barely got through that book once I was so agitated by the plight of the protagonist. I just wanted to know he was going to be okay. I think I emailed a friend at least three times while I was reading that book asking her to assure me that Theo was going to make it through that novel unscathed, so that I could finish it. I was that worried about him. Maybe it’s a good thing I never had my own children. I most likely would have unraveled in the worry. It helps to have a name for that now: Highly Sensitive Person. I used to think I was just too sensitive. (My mother’s lament: “You’re too sensitive.”) Now I’m just more selective about the books I read and the films I see.
So no, I didn’t read that book twice but I DID read a stellar review.
And food. Oh my. When I find a recipe I love? I want to make it over and over and over again until I can’t stand the sight of it, which is almost never. This past winter it was roasted red bell pepper soup. My beloved, white-on-white, actually ate that soup with me several times even though it was red. Turns out creamy sometimes supersedes white. Who knew? We’ve been married fifteen years and I’m still discovering his food quirks. But isn’t that what marriage is? A process of discovery.
Don’t even ask me about educational endeavors. I have enrolled in the same program two, sometimes three or four times, knowing that I will be engaging in a whole new way from an entirely different perspective. I love to learn new things. I love to relearn things I thought I knew. I guess you might say I am endlessly curious. When I look at photos of myself as a child I’ll notice that I am often looking intently at something. That’s how I find myself walking through the world today. Curious. Forget anti aging creams and super foods, if you want to stay young, just stay curious.
I even married twice. Granted the first one … well … 21 is so young. But that was a very long time ago and in my family (Italian immigrants) young women did not leave home to live on their own, ‘unprotected’. Yes, that. Astonishing isn’t it? I mean I’m really not that old but that was the culture in which I was raised. Here’s to number two.
Recently I’ve been dabbling in paint. First my walls. Now, my art journal. My father was a watercolor artist. I did not inherit his gift for painting but I am excited to play with this medium even though I produce nothing but color splotches. For me, there is something positively gleeful about watching the colors dance across the page. I notice that sometimes I paint with my non dominant hand. I’m not sure why that is but I do remember my mother making me sit at the kitchen table for what seemed like hours practicing my letters with my right hand (the ‘right’ hand), most likely because the nuns in my Catholic elementary school did not like the fact that I had chosen my left hand as the dominant one. I know, right? Again, that was the culture in which I was raised. Look mom, two hands! Maybe those tiresome trysts at the kitchen table paid off after all.
And maybe some day those splotches of color will find their way onto a wall, if even just the garage. Some is good. More is better. And too much, is just enough.
I’m curious. Am I alone here or do you, too, subscribe to the some is good, more is better, and too much is just enough club? And if so, where in your life does it show up? Do tell!
22 thoughts on “Some Is Good, More Is Better, & Too Much Is Just Enough”
As a fellow HSP, I so understand where you are coming from. I too will watch movies more than once. I totally get the some is good, more is better and too much is just enough club! I love that you are dabbling in watercolour. Pretend the garage is a giant canvas and enjoy too much is just enough.
I love that, Helen! Now to find some wall space in the garage. xxoo
So much here to relate to! I can’t cook ‘just enough’, I always over-cater, if I love a book I don’t just read it once, or even twice, but over and over again until I know huge chunks of it by heart. Films, ditto. I listen to the same music; I repeat pleasurable experiences, and they don’t diminish in the repeating. Good luck with the water colours, there is something I have never tried, though I love colour. I just don’t think I’d know where to start! X
Welcome to the some is good, more is better and too much is just enough club, Penny! Start with those watercolor crayons. They’re so much FUN!!! xxoo
Watercolor FUN! I haven’t played with watercolors much, but I’ve recently been getting an inkling to dabble some more in them. There’s something to just seeing where the colors and the water splotches go. I’m glad you’re having fun with paint Sue Ann! and I Definitely enjoy watching movies more than once. My latest fave is the Hundred Foot Journey. I watched that a few times in one weekend. 😉 wink.
Follow your muse, Shirley. I’m finding the watercolors so much more forgiving than acrylics and very little clean up involved so I can make play dates throughout the day. EAT.PLAY.SLEEP. Always lovely to see your smiling face. xxoo
This post became increasingly uncanny as I read on. Clearly we were separated at birth! 😉 I actually ended up taking a long break from The Goldfinch. Like 7 months. I picked it up again in April, and now I’m taking another little break from it. Hopefully just a week or two this time, though. Every time you start to really like Theo and begin to hope that things will finally work out for him, Donna Tartt pulls the rug out from under your feet… It’s a tough read for someone who is (you guessed it) a HSP. And yes, I almost always watch films twice. My favourite films I’ve probably watched around 20 times. My favourite books have been read 3-5 times. People don’t understand why I would reread books. I don’t understand why you wouldn’t. It’s never quite the same book. 😉
Neens! Kindred spirits, for sure. I probably should have put that book down, too. I can’t imagine what all that stress did to my adrenals. And then last year I impulsively purchased Gone Girl because everyone was talking about it and I didn’t really look at the content until my husband ordered the movie on Netflix. Thankfully I had the good sense to NOT read that one. And yes, I reread some of my favorite books yearly just to let the words wash over me one more time. Did you read All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr? Gorgeous writing.
My favorite line = “Forget anti aging creams and super foods, if you want to stay young, just stay curious.” I believe this with every fiber of my being. And I will add that it’s a better “younger” as you age because you’re old enough to appreciate it.
I love what you’re saying about “again.” Yes I repeat and repeat and repeat. Sometimes for education, sometimes for comfort.
Mostly, Sue Ann, I loved the photos. The top one, with the flower petals and tea? I’ll carry that image in my heart its so calming.
One last thing: David and I went to http://hellsbackbonegrill.com/ for a night and 2 meals during our spring break vacation. The BEST pumpkin soup in the world. I can’t wait to try your red pepper soup because it’s the creamy/veg combination I’m craving lately. So soothing. If ever you and I were lucky enough to roadtrip around Colorado, this restaruant is a must!
Rebecca, you+me road tripping around Colorado is on my bucket list. I think we need to start a vision board because it’s going to happen, I just feel it in my bones. LLP+
P.S. You will love that soup. It’s a keeper. You must have a very good blender to get the right consistency.
i will watch some movies so many times, i thought it was odd… and, perhaps it is but now i know i have company here.
and, yes… taking courses more than once. like my 3rd time in LLP! ha!
loving your musings Sue Ann.
xoxo
Kindred spirits for sure, Teresa, and I think you’re right, 3rd times a charm! So glad you’re in my Luscious Legacy Project Circle. xxoo
This is quite funny because It´s not uncommon for me to have two versions of the same book in my bookshelves just because the cover looks slightly different but I would never read the book twice in a row. I might read it again but preferably after one or more years. As you know there are even books I don´t even finish because I love them so much that I don´t want them to end. So in that sense I can relate to your sentiments on The Goldfinch and being so close to the hero that you feel like you almost know him or her personally :- ) Haven´t read it by the way, still on the fence…
love,
Carina
Carina, as much as I thought that book was exquisitely written (the language and rhythm so beautiful) I won’t be reading it again and I even hesitate to recommend it because it was so disturbing at times. Have you read All the Light We Cannot See by Anthony Doerr? Gorgeous writing.
P.S. I recently discovered that I had two copies of Day of Honey: A Memoir of Food, Love & War, a hardcover that I purchased when it first came out and then the paperback I purchased because someone mentioned it in LLP and I forgot that I already had it. #hopeless
I loved reading your article, Sue Ann. You have a beautiful gentle tone that always speaks to me. I too watch films that I love multiple times… in fact, one of my old movie loves was 50 First dates, I’m a hopeFULL romantic and have watched it too many times to count. As I was sitting at the hotel restaurant last week the musician setting up looked VERY familiar. I immediately recognized him from that movie, my brother-in-law was skeptical but I knew. My husband and I ended up introducing ourselves and it was him! 🙂 Pomaika’i Brown. He has a gorgeous voice and his wife is a beautiful dancer. Turns out they also have a 6 yo. Plus, I got to find out they shot all the interiors of 50 First Dates in LA over 2 weeks and then shot the exteriors back in Hawaii. Fun facts. 🙂 p.s. GoldFinch is still on my bookshelf unopened not sure I’m up for it. xoxo, Cami
I love that you met Pomaika’i Brown, Cami. In Hawaii no less. Talk about ‘small world’! I hope you told him your story and good for you for approaching him. Love that. Now I want to see that movie.
P.S. I’ll bet there are a whole lot of Goldfinch books sitting expectantly on the bookshelves of fellow HSPs. xxoo
Hi, beautifully written post. I love watching the same movie twice over the weekend too. I thought it was only me that can do that and i’m so glad knowing that you too do the same thing. Thanks for sharing. Great read.
You’re not alone!
I’ll echo someone else’s comment: I absolutely LOVE the first picture in this post. So warm and inviting.
I’m also part of the “read it many times” and “cook it many times” club, though I’ll find that after a prolonged period, I’ll completely stop. And then, some time later, I’ll rediscover and experience the feeling of first love that I had initially! I also do that with drinks — certain types of tea or water or smoothie — one kind over and over and over until I cry “uncle!”.
Thank you, Laura. I’m kind of partial to this little wooden box I have on my porch (I love old milk crates.) That’s where I like to sip tea and take photos. xxoo
Have you ever seen the movie The Philadelphia Story with Katherine Hepburn and Cary Grant? I swear, every time I see that movie, I get something else out of it. I’m also a HSP (just as my mother!) and struggle with too much never being enough. I wish I could learn to temper that in some situations (a whole box of Fudgee-O’s, really?) but I’m learning to embrace it as much as I can. Because how can too much love be a bad thing?
Haven’t seen that one but it sounds like one I might enjoy, thank you, Laura! And yes to too much love. xxoo